January 11, 2013
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
About 55,000 tourists visit Liechtenstein every year. This blog was viewed about 170,000 times in 2012. If it were Liechtenstein, it would take about 3 years for that many people to see it. Your blog had more visits than a small country in Europe!
December 7, 2012
Thank you, everyone, for continuing to read this blog. I have been doing a fair bit of travelling this year, and have been away from the internet for long chunks of time. I am constantly amazed, when I get a chance to sit back at Discussing Dissociation blog, to see how many readers there continue to be.
Y’all are something else because once again, we have had a new “highest number of views” day a few weeks ago, and 2012 has proven to be, by far, the busiest reading year yet. Thank you! I am hopeful and pleased to see that this blog is continuing to be a good resource for those of you wanting to learn more about Dissociative Disorders, Dissociative Identity Disorder, and various trauma related issues.
I’ve just approved a whole pile of wonderful comments that have been sitting here waiting for me…. Sorry for the delay, everyone. I do like to hear what you have to say. Thank you for your comments – they truly are much appreciated. It is a real joy to see when you all post comments back and forth to each other. I think that is excellent.
I have been thinking that some day soon, I should join the rest of the modern world and get one of those Ipad type things, or a phone with internet on it, or some fancy device that lets me stay more connected to the internet no matter where I am. I’ve been slow to do that…. However, coming here, and seeing that you all have been continuing to read encourages me to stay involved.
I do have more stories to tell, of course.
And I have more opinions about things, of course.
And I can see that I have some questions to answer, of course.
And you know I have more questions to ask, of course!
I hope you are having a better day than you expected to be having….
Sending warm thoughts your way,
September 11, 2012
This beautiful story was sent to me via email. I didn’t write this story, but I thought it was so heart-warming that I would pass it along to the rest of you. I hope you like it as much as I do.
In 2003, police in Warwickshire , England , opened a garden shed and found a whimpering, cowering dog. The dog had been locked in the shed and abandoned. It was dirty and malnourished, and had quite clearly been abused.
In an act of kindness, the police took the dog, which was a female greyhound, to the Nuneaton Warwickshire Wildlife Sanctuary, which is run by a man named Geoff Grewcock, and known as a haven for animals abandoned, orphaned, or otherwise in need.
Geoff and the other sanctuary staff went to work with two aims: to restore the dog to full health, and to win her trust. It took several weeks, but eventually both goals were achieved. They named her Jasmine, and they started to think about finding her an adoptive home.
Jasmine, however, had other ideas. No one quite remembers how it came about, but Jasmine started welcoming all animal arrivals at the sanctuary. It would not matter if it were a puppy, a fox cub, a rabbit or, any other lost or hurting animal. Jasmine would just peer into the box or cage and, when and where possible, deliver a welcoming lick.
Geoff relates one of the early incidents. “We had two puppies that had been abandoned by a nearby railway line. One was a Lakeland Terrier cross and another was a Jack Russell Doberman cross. They were tiny when they arrived at the centre, and Jasmine approached them and grabbed one by the scruff of the neck in her mouth and put him on the settee. Then she fetched the other one and sat down with them, cuddling them.”
“But she is like that with all of our animals, even the rabbits. She takes all the stress out of them, and it helps them to not only feel close to her, but to settle into their new surroundings.. She has done the same with the fox and badger cubs, she licks the rabbits and guinea pigs, and even lets the birds perch on the bridge of her nose.”
Jasmine, the timid, abused, deserted waif, became the animal sanctuary’s resident surrogate mother, a role for which she might have been born. The list of orphaned and abandoned youngsters she has cared for comprises five fox cubs, four badger cubs, fifteen chicks, eight guinea pigs, two stray puppies and fifteen rabbits – and one roe deer fawn. Tiny Bramble, eleven weeks old, was found semi-conscious in a field. Upon arrival at the sanctuary, Jasmine cuddled up to her to keep her warm, and then went into the full foster-mum role. Jasmine the greyhound showers Bramble the roe deer with affection, and makes sure nothing is matted.
“They are inseparable,” says Geoff. “Bramble walks between her legs, and they keep kissing each other. They walk together round the sanctuary. It’s a real treat to see them.”
Jasmine will continue to care for Bramble until she is old enough to be returned to woodland life. When that happens, Jasmine will not be lonely. She will be too busy showering love and affection on the next orphan or victim of abuse.
Pictured from the left are: “Toby”, a stray Lakeland dog; “Bramble”, orphaned roe deer; “Buster”, a stray Jack Russell; a dumped rabbit; “Sky”, an injured barn owl; and “Jasmine”, with a mother’s heart doing best what a caring mother would do…and such is the order of God’s Creation.
And, just in case you wondered, Snopes.com, ( found at: http://www.snopes.com/photos/animals/jasmine.asp )
has verified the truth of this wonderful story and the reality of these photographs which accompany the story.
So you can pass this story on, and maybe make someone else’s day to be just a little brighter!
I think the world needs more Jasmine’s!
Doesn’t she have just the most beautiful spirit?
We people have so much to learn …
I hope you enjoyed this story.
September 10, 2012
Recently, I had a conversation asking the question whether the insiders in a dissociative system should be called parts or people. And now, after recently reading Insomniac’s cute comment to me about that very same topic, I’ve decided to make a quick, informal post about it. I’m interested in hearing what the rest of you think about this topic.
Of course, the official “politically correct” term is probably parts. Well, maybe it’s still “officially” supposed to be alters, but yuck. Personally, I really dislike the term alters, and I really don’t use it often – it’s not a comfortable term in my opinion. Nope. It has too many other implications for me, and I just don’t go there very often. But the word parts – that one I have used many times.
However…. It is true, that when I get to know people with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID / MPD), and I get to know their insiders, those inside people become exactly that to me — people. DID people are people with a lot of people. I don’t see the insiders as “parts” anymore. I see them, experience them, interact with them, relate to them, remember them, refer to them just like they are people in their own right. Real people. Not a part of one someone. A group of individual someones.
For right, or for wrong – that is how it feels.
I realize this is probably not at all the expected “mental health professional” stance on describing dissociative systems. It’s not an intellectual approach. This is a statement about what the experience is like for me when I meet you all.
So yes, to me, insiders are like people. They are people that share a body, but they are people, many of whom are easily recognized as their own person within the group of people.
Inside people very much have their own voice. They have their own presentation, their own thoughts, beliefs, memories, feelings, body sensations, facial gestures, perceptions, clothing, jobs, etc etc. They can each make the same body look very different (that’s so fascinating to me!). They have their own eyes, their own way of sitting, their own way of walking. They have their own way of speaking and their own way of writing. They become their own selves. And in a way that they are not parts of any one someone, but more like they are important members of a group.
Groups are one, but the groups are filled full of lots of different individuals. Each of these individuals will have their own unique reason for being part of the group, and the whole of the group is completely flavored by the individuals that belong to it.
It is amazing to me that there are such differences between the people in a dissociative system. I realize that many of these differences are probably related to the differing demands being placed on the person as a whole at the time of creating each specific new insider, including some not-so-happy reasons to need to be somebody else. However, the basic ability to become somebody else (even to pretend to be somebody else) has got to be an incredible talent in itself – I know I can’t do that very well (and yes, I have tried, funny enough. I guess that’s why I’m not a Hollywood actress, lol.)
My hat is off to dissociative people who have created and developed highly sophisticated life skills at being different people.
It’s a rather awesome ability, if you ask me.
Copyright © 2008-2012 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
May 1, 2012
I hope you are doing well today.
This will be a short post, but I made an important update to the Discussing Dissociation blog and wanted to be sure that you all knew about it.
I have been asked repeatedly about my views on integration. I’ve written posts and comments about this topic, but unfortunately, I didn’t create a “category” for these posts. So now, with the 170+ articles on this blog, these posts and comments are difficult to find. Of course! This means it’s time to simplify this topic search for everyone, and to make it simpler for the Discussing Dissociation readers to find these blog articles.
If you look on the right side of this page, scroll down until you see the Categories drop-down box. I’ve added the category “Integration – yes or no” to this feature.
This drop-box will link you to here.
I’m assuming, in all my many blatherings on this blog that I’ve made more comments about integration than just what is written in these two blog articles. However, this link is a good start. If anyone finds comments about integration in other articles, please let me know, so I can be sure to add that article to the category list as well.
In case you don’t have time to read the other articles at the moment, I’ll give you a quick summary of what I think about integration right here in this post.
Quick Thoughts about Integration – Kathy Broady’s Opinions:
Is integration necessary?
Is integration beneficial?
I doubt it.
Is integration the ultimate peak / proof of healing for dissociative trauma survivors?
Not at all.
Does integration need to be your treatment goal?
Not unless you say so. I wouldn’t ever ever make it a treatment goal for any of my clients.
If integration is not the treatment goal, what is?
Team work. Lowering the dissociative walls between internal people. Internal communication. Talking together. Not hiding information from each other. Building trust and genuine relationships within your system. Learning to genuinely love and care for each other.
Do you, Kathy, think that integration is possible?
Honestly? Not really. Not complete and “total” integration. I have not yet met anyone who integrated in such a way that they stayed integrated permanently for the rest of their life. I have not even met anyone that I would say has been integrated successfully for years of time. I have heard the stories of many such claims, and met some of these people, but in my opinion, none of the “integrated” people that I have ever talked with were able to literally demonstrate true integration. They were still very multiple in oh so many ways.
I’m not convinced that a person who has lived most of their entire life as a multiple can literally change their brain in such ways to become a singleton. Besides, what would be the point anyway?
Do you think that blending is possible?
Yes, absolutely. To me, blending and coming closely connected together in a co-conscious ways are very different from integration. Blending does not imply a complete union of absolutely everyone. It is perfectly natural, normal, and healthy for some of the splits to become more blended together, especially those parts that are already very close to each other. If their blending happens naturally, that is great. You cannot force blending to happen, and it doesn’t happen instantly. It is a very gradual process that happens over years of excellent therapy, healing work, and genuine external safety. If there is any kind of “forcing” or demanded blending under duress or coercion or deception, you can bet that those insiders will step back and separate again in the not so distant future.
Do you think that integration keeps you safe?
Ummmm…. No. In fact, I think that claims of integration can lead to the very opposite of safety. Why? Because I think that real and genuine integration so very rarely happens (if ever), that when someone begins to believe that they are integrated, this is the beginning of some really dangerous times. This typically means, in my experience, that some of the top layers of the system may have blended together, and/or learned how to work well together, but the darker under-layers of the system have hidden behind very thick dissociative walls. This is extremely dangerous because the dark parts are able to function without being noticed, and the top layers of the system are too busy being proud or protective of their integration and/or completely absorbed in their outside lives that they don’t notice the dark rumblings behind the wall.
Do you think that integrated multiples are safe leaders for other dissociative survivors?
No. Not that I have seen. In my opinion, it is much more likely that the alleged “integrated multiple” has very neatly hidden or shoved away their dark sides, even if they do not realize this. All the claims in the world of being integrated do not actually make someone integrated.
In fact, following the leadership of someone who alleges to be an “integrated multiple” can be extremely dangerous for others, especially for those who are newer in their healing process. You would be safer to run 100 miles in the other direction than to assume that an integrated multiple is “automatically” a safe person.
I know many of you will not like these statements, and it is ok if you disagree. I am not meaning to offend you. We each have our own opinion and our own experiences in life. Let me repeat this, because it is so very important. In my years of experience, “integrated multiples” have more often than not been used as lures, and in reality, they are people who have not completed HUGE areas of work, and they are not automatically “safe” people. Going further into this topic is an entirely different blog post, but in my opinion, there is a whole whopping lot of danger in this area. PLEASE be careful when you meet an “integrated multiple”.
I am very aware that there are many multiples who have had spiritually-based integrations. That is yet another complicated topic, to be discussed at another time.
Ok – this was going to be short (and of course, it’s not short!!), so I’ll stop at this point. I can feel the waters already getting stirred out there. Ah well. What is life without controversy, yes?
IF I thought integration was a great thing, I would certainly say so. I just haven’t seen it as such.
What about you?
Do you have any comments about integration?
Copyright © 2008-2012 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
March 17, 2012
I don’t have any idea why this is the case, but this week, the Discussing Dissociation blog had it’s highest viewing day ever. Ever! Since the very beginning back in December 2008 ever! The highest number of viewers in a single day. This week.
Maybe Emma and Maizy are just that wonderful? They probably think they are. I think they are too, but even so… it surely can’t be just Emma and Maizy, lol. Or is it??!
Whatever it is, and why-ever it happened, I appreciate the readers of this blog. You’ve been a bright spot in my life, you’ve been encouraging and appreciative, and I thank you for the ways you all have had a positive influence on me.
My life has been in a huge transition in so many ways in 2011 and 2012, and as I’ve written before, sometimes I had connection with the internet, and sometimes not. Despite my inability to be consistently available to anyone or anything this past year – especially with my web people — the fact that the readers of this blog have continued to be here, and remained supportive, kind, and dedicated has truly been a blessing to my life.
I have all kinds of ideas, hopes, and dreams about where to go and what to do with this blog in future months / years. As per usual, I have far more creative ideas than I could ever accomplish in one lifetime, so we’ll see how many of my new ideas I actually get done. The point being, there is a lot of good ahead. That’s how I view life. No matter how many difficulties have happened in the past, there are so many positive and beautiful options ahead.
I know that the readers of Discussing Dissociation are not strangers to rough years, difficult times, intense pain, heartbreak, loss, grief, illness, conflict, and death. I know you all are more than familiar with the dark overbearing powers of the world, and the overwhelming heaviness of trauma, abuse, and cruelty. You all have seen more horrors than I can shake a stick at, and still you persevere, and grow, and heal, and progress in life.
THAT is amazing. Even Maizy thinks so.
So many of you are an inspiration to me. So many of you have been a shining light in the midst of the most horrible storms. You have an inner strength and beauty that cannot be squished or squashed or squelched no matter how much torment and evil you have seen.
THAT is an inspiration to me.
So thank you. Thank you for staying true to yourselves. Thank you for staying true to your healing. Thank you for staying invested in the good sides of life. And thank you for standing by me while I have been here, there, and everywhere. (My current bouncing schedule isn’t quite over yet, unfortunately, but I know that some things are resolving little bit by little bit.)
And thank you, again, for reading this blog.
You are very much appreciated.
Copyright © 2008-2012 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
January 15, 2012
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Over 300,000 times, thank you.
Why 300,000 thank you’s?
Because over the years of this blog, there have already been over 300,000 views from you, the readers.
And 2011, the quietest year having by far the fewest new posts and the fewest comments, still had the most views of any single calendar year!
These are amazing numbers to me. I am truly blown away by the continued reading and ongoing support of the Discussing Dissociation blog, so thank you.
I truly appreciate you all.
Copyright © 2008-2012 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
January 13, 2012
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 110,000 times in 2011. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 5 days for that many people to see it.
January 2, 2011
The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:
The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.
The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 110,000 times in 2010. If it were an exhibit at The Louvre Museum, it would take 5 days for that many people to see it.
In 2010, there were 43 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 152 posts. There were 57 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 19mb. That’s about 1 pictures per week.
The busiest day of the year was February 24th with 631 views. The most popular post that day was Pictures of DID – “How I View My Head”.
Where did they come from?
The top referring sites in 2010 were healthdiaries.com, z3.invisionfree.com, twitter.com, mail.yahoo.com, and abuseconsultants.com.
Some visitors came searching, mostly for hoarding, discussing dissociation, sleeping, compulsive hoarding, and dissociative experiences scale.
Attractions in 2010
These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.
Pictures of DID – “How I View My Head” February 2010
List of All Articles on this blog January 2009
Compulsive Hoarding and Dissociative Disorders December 2009
Scoring the Dissociative Experiences Scale (DES) June 2009
Switching in Your Sleep -– Are you Snoozing or Secretly Awake? August 2010
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