January 11, 2013
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2012 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
About 55,000 tourists visit Liechtenstein every year. This blog was viewed about 170,000 times in 2012. If it were Liechtenstein, it would take about 3 years for that many people to see it. Your blog had more visits than a small country in Europe!
January 15, 2012
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Over 300,000 times, thank you.
Why 300,000 thank you’s?
Because over the years of this blog, there have already been over 300,000 views from you, the readers.
And 2011, the quietest year having by far the fewest new posts and the fewest comments, still had the most views of any single calendar year!
These are amazing numbers to me. I am truly blown away by the continued reading and ongoing support of the Discussing Dissociation blog, so thank you.
I truly appreciate you all.
Copyright © 2008-2012 Kathy Broady and Discussing Dissociation
January 13, 2012
The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.
Here’s an excerpt:
The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 110,000 times in 2011. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 5 days for that many people to see it.
December 6, 2010
Hello to all the Readers of the Discussing Dissociation Blog –
Earlier this year, I set a personal goal of inviting at least 100,000 readers to this blog in the calendar year of 2010.
Thanks to each of you, the Discussing Dissociation Blog has surpassed that goal!!
I deeply appreciate each of you that have participated in this blog.
I appreciate the colors your have brought to this blog, and the depth you have added.
I appreciate the honesty and tenderness that each of you have shown in your comments.
I appreciate that you have openly shared your experiences in such a way that others can relate to what you’ve been through, and feel comforted in knowing that they are not alone.
I appreciate your kindness to me.
I appreciate your gentleness and support to each other.
I appreciate the courage that you have each shown in taking such a stand against the violence and ugliness in the world. You are each making the world a better place, and that is so very important.
I hope that you continue to find helpful information, a supportive environment, and encouraging motivation for your healing journey each time that you sit here in this place.
I’m glad you’re here!
Kathy Broady LCSW
Copyright © 2008-2010 Kathy Broady LCSW and Discussing Dissociation
November 21, 2010
I would like to make a follow-up comment from a comment made on the “What Would Your Perfect Treatment Plan Look Like?” blog.
Specifically, a portion of heartofindigo’s comment includes the following paragraph:
a final comment: I wish that T’s would do exactly what you are doing, and ask. I have heard of so many… can’t think of a way to put this delicately… asinine demands on the patient. like the therapist doesn’t trust the patient’s process or intent or something. like the therapist has “superior knowledge.” unless one has DID, I don’t see how one can assume that they can make the judgment about what is working or not. that has to come from the patient, and so there HAS to be a partnership.
plus that will empower us to reclaim our power, which is the root of the problem in the first place.
This is an extremely important point.
The dissociative survivor IS the expert for what helps them.
And from what I can see in reading through the comments in the previous blog, the normal 50-minute hour is far from helpful. For most dissociative trauma survivors, it’s not sufficient, it’s not enough, and in many ways, it’s not helpful. DID survivors simply need more time to make sufficient progress in therapy.
Should insurance panels be the final “experts” on how long sessions can be and on how many sessions a trauma survivor can have?
If DID clients are cash-paying for their therapy, can they make their own decisions about how much time they would like to have with their therapist?
Should therapists or counselors have the final say on how much time a dissociative client needs to work on their issues?
Should psychiatrists or doctors have the ultimate decision-making power to determine all treatment plans for dissociative trauma survivors?
Who gets to decide these things? Are clients allowed to have freedom of choice and the freedom to want or request something more or different than the norm? Do mental health professionals have the only vote about what is helpful?
In too many instances, treatment plans for dissociative survivors are designed by – and limited by — mental health professionals and insurance companies. And all too many DID survivors truly do not get their therapeutic needs met because the mental health professionals are setting “appropriate limits” to what they are willing to offer their clients. These limits are decided on based on the therapist opinion, and not on the clients’ needs.
In my personal opinion, a 50-minute session once per week is barely scraping the surface of what is needed to work with the dissociative population. Most DID survivors have a minimum of 5-10 insiders that could productively use the therapy session time at any given day, and the issues that these 5-10 insiders would be discussing would not be simple issues. Typically everyone in the DID system has complicated situations, painful issues, complex conflicts to discuss. Is this going to happen in 50 minutes? Not likely. Is everyone going to get a turn in 50 minutes? Absolutely not. In reality, it would be more likely that each and every insider could fill up a 50-minute session! To have to share such limited therapy time between so many inner people means that the pertinent and important issues just are not discussed in any great depth or detail. It takes a lot longer to make progress because so much just can’t be addressed.
Because of dissociative walls, the need to switch between inside parts, amnesia between many parts, time distortion, other dissociative complications, etc., it very often takes a DID survivor longer to dig into the issues of the day, and longer to get grounded and stabilized afterwards. Having the time to talk to a few of the insiders, to get their opinions about the topic, or to give them a chance to talk about their own issues does not happen quickly.
Part of what created and solidified dissociative identity disorder in the first place was having no where to discuss complicated, painful emotions, turmoil, and distress. For the therapy hour to remain a drop in the bucket in terms of meeting the needs, it leaves the dissociative survivor feeling like they will never get through the healing process. And in some ways, that is too close to being true.
But is it therapeutic exploitation to “allow” clients to have longer sessions and / or more than one 50-minute session per week?
When is too much? If a DID client needs more than normal, even for the dissociative population, should they be allowed to have more sessions than normal?
Should therapists be “required” to set an “appropriate limits and boundaries” by insisting on short sessions, even if DID survivors say and believe they need more time in therapy?
If clients say they need 2-hour or even 3-hour sessions, should they be allowed to have extended sessions? OR should therapists have the right and responsibility to limit these sessions to “normal limits” instead?
Whose opinion is correct?
In these situations, do therapists know best or do dissociative trauma survivors know best?
In case of a disagreement between the client and therapist, who should have the final say in length of sessions and frequency of sessions?
As heartofindigo stated, a big part of the healing process is about reclaiming personal power that was not allowed during the years of trauma.
Is freedom to decide length and frequency of sessions part of client empowerment? Or part of therapeutic responsibility?
What are your thoughts about this dilemma?
Kathy Broady LCSW
Copyright © 2008-2010 Kathy Broady LCSW and Discussing Dissociation
October 22, 2010
My news of the week can be summarized in the following quotes from two eCollegeFinder letters:
I’d like to congratulate you, as Discussing Dissociation has been nominated for eCollegeFinder’s Wellness Guru Award. eCollegeFinder is an online education resource dedicated to inspiring and informing college students with comprehensive online tools and information. The Wellness Guru Award recognizes the top web experts that offer students mental, physical and emotional advice. Your website has shown commitment to assisting individuals in their pursuit of a healthier lifestyle and this award is intended to commend your efforts.
Congratulations, you have been selected as one of eCollegeFinder’s top 50 Wellness Gurus Award! To recognize your excellence, we have dedicated an entire page to the Wellness Gurus Award that allows our readers to learn more about your blog and what inspires you: http://www.ecollegefinder.org/wellnessguru.aspx
… Congratulations on your achievement and we hope that this recognition will continue the promotion of wellness.
So thank you to eCollegeFinder for selecting Discussing Dissociation – Thoughts from a Trauma Therapist as a winner for the Wellness Guru Award! That is a wonderful recognition, and I sincerely appreciate the honor.
Also, to whoever it is out there in the world who nominated Discussing Dissociation for this award – THANK YOU too! I have no idea who submitted this blog to the eCollegeFinder organization, but I am very grateful and I feel deeply honored that you would consider this blog to be an award-worthy site for individuals pursuing wellness and a healthy lifestyle.
And I do wish a lifetime of WELLNESS to each and every reader of this blog!
Kathy Broady LCSW
Copyright © 2008-2010 Kathy Broady LCSW and Discussing Dissociation
November 28, 2009
It’s Thanksgiving weekend here in the US, and besides the wonderful traditional family meal and pleasant times with my kids, this time frame reminds me of something else.
Discussing Dissociation has been up and visible for nearly one year now. Yep, in a few days, it will be a year already!
Wow. Where has the time gone??!!!
There is truth to the saying that time flies, or is it because time flies when you’re having fun … or maybe I’m just getting older, lol.
Anyway, I’m being silly, but I do want to say today how much I appreciate all of you that have been readers here at this blog. The number of faithful, returning readers has been utterly amazing to me. If you look back through all the pages, you’ll see well over a thousand excellent comments from a wide variety of the readers. Wow! The input you all have made in this blog has brought it to life and given it a life-filled energy that I certainly couldn’t create on my own.
For the way each and every one of you have contributed to the positive, educational nature of this blog, I sincerely thank you. I truly appreciate your involvement, your thoughts, your comments, your questions. You’ve helped to make this little site a safe, comfortable community for dissociative trauma survivors. I think it’s a job well done, and once again, I do sincerely thank you for your part in this process. Writing a blog wouldn’t be nearly so fun without hearing comments from the readers! You all rock!
Many of you have questioned why I started this blog in the first place. The original reason is not as mysterious or worrisome as some of you may have thought. It’s a widely stated and highly recommended common practice for therapists to use blogs for marketing purposes. Marketing experts recommend to write what you know about, and to respond to the comments you receive. Blogs get quickly listed in search engines, and they are an easy, economical way for your target audience to get to know you, and to see what you do, and to become more familiar with the work that you do. It’s a simple as that. Check the blogosphere for blogs by therapists. You’ll see that most therapists write about their fields of work the same as I do.
I just happen to know about a very specialized topic – dissociative identity disorder. And my readers are a very distinct but wonderful population – dissociative trauma survivors or trauma therapists. (There aren’t very many of us out here — it’s no wonder that we are congregating together!) And yes, practically all of my blog articles have been very specific to DID, not that the topics couldn’t also apply to other populations, but the point of this blog is to “discuss dissociation” so I do tailor my articles to being about dissociative disorders, and the DID population. There’s no mystery there, lol. I think I’ve said that pretty upfront.
But something much bigger has been happening besides my having found a very effective marketing tool.
With all the positive sharing and support that has been created here, this blog has provided a deep sense of hope and healing for so many people. Having that absolute knowing that others are progressing along their healing journey as well, many survivors don’t have to feel so very alone. You might learn things from my articles, but you can also learn from each other, the same as I learn from you as well. It’s a wonderful circle of positive, helpful information, and that in itself is priceless.
Building a sense of safety, knowing you are not alone in your struggles, and learning from others who have been there too provide emotional foundations that so very crucial to healing and can augment your therapeutic process. Please remember, this blog is in no means a substitute for actual therapy, but it does provide a lot of educational support for survivors working on their own healing, or for therapists learning about working DID / MPD.
Again, you all have immensely helped to create that healing, informative atmosphere, and I am grateful for that.
We have to create and protect places of healing.
Even survivor-led blogs such as the truly incredible BTC blog have become targets for destruction by the “hazing / flaming / insaniacs” of the world. Do we really want the haters and gossipers to take over and ruin all the places of healing and support? How sad is this?!!
I know that you know there are predators and perpetrators out there in the world. For some of you, your abuse stopped years ago. For some of you, you are still smack dab in the middle of fighting your abusers. Some of you are being hassled and manipulated by internet predators (whether you know it or not), and some of you are safely away from any direct attack from anyone. No matter where you are in your life, there are abusers and predators out there in the world, (including those wolves in sheep’s clothing hiding within the dissociative population itself), so the importance of having safe retreats amongst all the danger and destruction is more important than you might realize.
Those of you that feel the loss of BTC’s blog can understand what I’m talking about. It’s a real shame that abusive people continue to ruin the good places and run off the good people. I think that is a tragedy. But it happens.
- Are you one that sits back quietly, doing nothing even though you see others destroying places of support?
- Do you believe the lies and negative gossip spread about helpers and healers?
- Are you so angry from your own abuse that you are willing to take that out on people who have helped you?
Surely the survivor population can see through the manipulations of abusers. You are adults now – you can start seeing through the tricks that are being played out there. Please remember to think for yourself the next time you hear some negative hogwash about someone who has dared to be a helper / healer. You can take a stand against that.
Complacency only allows abuse to continue.
Trauma survivors, I encourage you to ban together in protection of your valued and positive healing resources.
So many of you grew up without any safety or comfort or support. You learned to pull deep within yourself or to block out the world entirely. You survived it alone.
But it doesn’t have to be that way anymore.
Most of you are still learning about how important and helpful it is to have places of safe connection, genuine relationship, and gentle bonding. It may be scary to be around people, but building a positive, healing, trustworthy community is a way of overcoming the need to be isolated in order to avoid abuse.
Again, I challenge you to protect your places of healing. Protect those that are your helpers. Stand firm around your leaders that fight against abuse.
Don’t fall into the trap of complacency or destructive participation.
Your healing resources are depending on that.
Kathy Broady LCSW
Copyright © 2008-2010 Kathy Broady LCSW and Discussing Dissociation
September 6, 2009
I am still amazed by the excellent group discussion and active participation that was generated by my last blog post. Considering that one of the main purposes of this blog is to “discuss dissociation”, I think that’s good! Thank you, everyone, for your active interest. I do appreciate that.
I have been contemplating a number of different follow up topics after such an intense discussion. There is a wide variety of important offshoot directions that I could take.
However, after reading some of the comments submitted, I’ve decided to first post some tips and guidelines to remember while using this blog as a healing resource.
The longer I have Discussing Dissociation, the more I can see how reading this blog — or any blog – can have a significant impact as a healing resource. What do you do with the information that you read? Why do you read it? What keeps you interested and coming back? I’ve been thinking about all that, and it’s becoming clearer to me how this blog is having an impact on the healing process for many of you.
Thank you. I am genuinely honored that so many of you are using this blog as a resource.
There are some things that I would like for you to remember while you are reading this blog.
1. I am simply sharing my thoughts based on my experiences as a trauma therapist who specialized in dissociative identity disorder, but there is nothing “simple” about DID. I find it very hard to dissect the complex, layered, multi-faceted elements of DID into one single article, 700-1500 words at a time. There is just sooooo much more to say about each and every topic, and please know that for every point in one direction, I completely understand there are 20 other points facing other directions. But one blog article can only be so long before it becomes too cumbersome to read or write. But … keep reading over time. The more I post, the more the various angles will be addressed.
2. The way each individual trauma therapist conducts his or her therapy sessions is as unique as the way an artist paints a picture. Your therapist may very well do things very differently than I do. That is not unusual, and the challenge is to incorporate the information and methods that works best for you and your healing. It is not about right or wrong – it is about what works for you.
3. I hope that the issues discussed in this blog encourage you to think. I do not presume to have all the answers, but I can give you a starting place to process and explore your trauma issues. Learning to think for yourself is a very crucial part of your healing. Please take the information I provide and work with it as it fits for you. Ask yourself questions. Journal about it. Check inside. Write a comment. Write more about it on your own blog. Just remember – your abusers would have controlled your thinking for a very long time. Breaking out of their dictated thought processes is very important, so yes — thinking on your own is a very good thing.
4. Please know that it is ok to take the topics you have read in my blog to your therapist for more individual discussion on a personal level. I write about the things I have learned in my 25 years of working with trauma and dissociative disorders. I know patterns relating to the DID/MPD diagnosis, typical information about survivors with DID/MPD, techniques to use in sessions, questions to ask, etc. But your therapist knows you and your internal system. If you find information that seems to fit you, please discuss this further with your therapist.
5. If you feel particularly triggered or upset by anything written in this blog, including the comments written by other readers, please discuss this with your therapist as well. Emotional triggers can be uncomfortable and upsetting, but they can also be enormously valuable milestones in your healing process. If you work with triggers to understand what they are bringing up for you, you can most definitely use this information to push further into your healing.
6. Please understand that your therapist and I may have very different approaches to working with DID. That is ok – to each his own. As I said, each therapist is his or her own person, and we all work in the ways that best fit us as individuals. However, if you see a significant contradiction in what I say compared to what your therapist does, it is ok and important to talk to your therapist about this. This blog is not intended to undermine your therapy or your therapist’s opinion. I emphasize again — I hope that you can and will openly discuss any significant questions or concerns with your therapist, as needed.
7. If you are a regular reader of this blog, I strongly encourage you to let your therapist know that you read here, especially if you are finding that you are having any personal or internal reactions (either positive or negative) while reading here. It’s often important for a therapist to know where their clients are getting information. It’s been historically proven that some members the dissociative population can be easily persuaded and affected by opinions of others. If you feel or believe that this blog is affecting you on that level, please be sure to discuss this with your therapist.
9. Remember that you will be reading and interpreting articles and comments from your own personal perspectives, life experiences, and trauma issues. It’s nearly impossible to not do this. The key isn’t to fight or deny that, but to be aware of its impact. We all assign meaning and interpretation of what we read from our history and assumptions. It typically takes a lot of hard work and detailed conversation to genuinely understand each other, especially if someone is saying something different than what you already believe or expect. Genuine communication is hard work. But that’s ok. It’s important work.
10. This can be seen here already, and if you look, you’ll see examples to what I’m talking about. Of course, you can all see what I’ve written and you can hear my preferences. Go beyond that for variety. There are well over 1000 comments made here in this blog. Have you noticed that some of the frequent commenters here have a visible theme / repeated perspective to their comments? Remember — I did not say this is a bad thing. It’s an engrained perspective that naturally affects interpretation. What is your long-term perspective on therapy / therapists / healing / DID / abuse, etc.? How do these things affect how your think? Just keep these ideas in mind as you are interpreting what you read.
More Questions for Thought:
When you read something on this blog (or any blog) that is particularly powerful for you, what do you do with that information?
Do you journal about it? Talk with your insiders about it? Do you talk to your therapist about it?
How does reading this blog help you? What does it give you?
How does this blog impact your life? Your healing? Your therapy?
How does reading the blogs of other survivors help you?
What do you do with differences of opinion? Is it ok for people to disagree? Is it upsetting for you to see conflicting perspectives?
What if I present an idea that is opposite to how your therapist works. What do you do then?
How do you incorporate what you are learning here into your daily life with your insiders?
What do your insiders think of the various topics covered in this blog? Are you all talking together about the information you read here?
Good communication is very hard work, but positive internal communication is the key to healing from dissociative identity disorder. The more you can talk and communicate effectively with your entire system, the more healing and progress you will make. Let what you are learning from communicating in this blog group apply towards helping you communicate effectively with your internal group.
Kathy Broady LCSW
June 6, 2009
I am happy to announce that the first group chat for readers of the Discussing Dissociation blog will be held tomorrow night, Saturday June 6 at 7 PM Central Standard Time, with Daylight Savings.
To participate in this group chat, you will need to sign up through www.AbuseConsultants.com using the $5 email consultation form. Click the $5 email icon on the home page of AbuseConsultants.com. That will take you to the Business Office / Services page. Click the Consultation Email link on the left, click the Order Here link, and follow the procedures for ordering a $5 email consultation.
I have been doing online therapy since 2001. The risks and benefits on online therapy consultations are explained on the AbuseConsultants.com website. The legalities of having therapeutic interaction with me are also detailed on the AbuseConsultants website. Please refer there for additional information, especially in the Business Office pages of the site.
The chat will last a minimum of one hour, and could last up to two hours, depending on how many people participate in the chat.
Here are some guidelines to follow:
Have a specific and private MSN messenger screen name ahead of time. DO NOT USE YOUR REAL NAME when signing up for this MSN screen name. Be sure to use a nickname, preferably something similar to your screen name that you post with at this blog. It is best that you do not use the MSN screen name that you use with your friends and family members. It is much better to have a brand new screen name that is not associated with anyone else in your personal life. This new and anonymous screen name will help to protect your privacy – that is very important.
Yes, by signing up through AbuseConsultants.com, I will see the name / address from your credit card. I will not see any of your banking information. No one from the group will see your personal information and it is as equally private giving that information to me as it is when you give your name and address to your own therapist.
Please remember that I am a licensed mental health professional, and I am required by law to keep your personal information confidential. I will keep your info confidential the same as I keep my other client’s information confidential.
The topic for this first group chat will be a question and answer format. I would like each participant to prepare ahead of time at least five questions to have on hand that you would like to ask me about DID therapy and DID treatment issues. Have your questions typed up and ready so that you can copy-paste your questions into the IM chat when it is your turn.
I cannot guarantee that there will be sufficient time to have all five questions answered in this group chat, but I will do my best! Having a minimum of five questions prepared ahead of time will allow for duplicate questions (in case someone else wants to know some similar as to what you want to know), and it will keep you from having to figure things out “on the spot”.
This group chat will be geared towards adult parts. Since this is the first group chat, it will be particularly important for you to stay adult for this chat. You may ask questions on behalf of your child parts, but I really suggest that you do your best to stay as old as you can. It is a matter of safety to not let your child parts out with a group of people that you do not know very well. Let’s work on practicing safety first by keeping the littles tucked in for this initial chat.
This group chat is not designed as an appropriate place for crisis material. If you are acutely suicidal or acutely struggling with self-injury, this group setting is not an appropriate place for you. Contact your personal therapist or your local 911 emergency services. This group chat is for educational purposes, for discussing dissociative disorders, and will not be used as a dumping ground for crisis work.
If someone pushes that boundary, your local 911 police will most likely be called. I will be doing group work, so I will not be able to attend to your individual crisis.
During the chat, everyone will be expected to use proper social manners, including appropriate language. Be sure to share the IM time with others, but please speak up comfortably when it is your turn. I will lead the group discussion as effectively as I can, and if things get too hectic during the chat, I will ask everyone to stop and let me help get the group re-grounded again. Please follow my lead. It’s not as easy to get people to be quiet for a bit over an IM as it is in person, so please be sure to read what I type, and please respect my leadership.
I have led a lot of group chats with the members at SurvivorForum.com, and these group chats have been very helpful and positive. However, the group chat is as beneficial as the group members will allow it to be. Your positive, active, polite participation will make all the difference.
If you decide that you want to join the group chat scheduled for June 6 at 7 PM CST, please sign up now. After you have submitted your $5 consultation fee, please add me to your contact list as KathyBfromAC at yahoo.com .
I’m looking forward to chatting with you soon!
May 18, 2009
I have had an idea this week.
Would you all like to talk together — along with me — in a group conversation via Instant Messenger?
There are a lot of faithful regular readers here at DiscussingDissociation, and we have had a lot of interaction back and forth in the comment sections. I greatly appreciate this interaction, and frankly, I think that reading and responding to your comments are the best parts of having this blog!
So the conversation element is really nice. It’s important, and it’s very helpful in terms of communicating and understanding each other.
At SurvivorForum, we have group IM chats every now and then. Those that want to participate in this sign up ahead of time, we each set up our IM contacts so we are able to chat, and then we meet together in a live group IM chat setting for a group talk. These chats have been helpful, and can be about any topic that is relevant to the group members participating in the chat.
Now, I don’t know if any of you all would be interested or willing to do something like that, but I thought I could offer it to you as something to consider. What do you think?
If this goes well, we could potentially have regular group chats based on various topics that can be scheduled ahead of time. For this first chat, I suggest the topics will be “Introduction to the Group and Group Chats” (just so everyone can get familiar with how this works) and “Bring Three Questions to ask Kathy”. And don’t worry, if you all run out of questions to ask me, I’ll certainly have plenty of questions to ask you!
If you are interested in participating in this kind of group chat, please leave a comment below. If it looks like there are enough people to meet, I’ll set a time in the near future. Times will be based from the Central Standard Time Zone (currently daylights savings time).
I could potentially set up a calendar of times / topics so that people can know ahead of time if they want to sign up for a particular group chat. If this idea catches on, we could feasibly have different live group chats on a frequent and regular basis.
Since this is a new option, I’m going to keep the price to $5.00 per chat for now. You’ll be able to purchase your group chat through AbuseConsultants.com. Length of the chat, for now, will depend on the interest in this idea and the number of participants. I assume, however, that the chat will be at least an hour in length, and quite possibly longer if there are more than five participants.
So what do you think?
If you are interested, please create a brand new MSN IM address to use for these chats – create a new MSN IM address that is NOT your normal IM chat address. Make sure to not use your real name while signing up for the chat name. KEEP YOUR PRIVACY by using your blogging name, not your legal name. Do not put your legal name on anything at all connected to this new IM address. It is very very important that you not hand out your real name and your real IM address to people that you do not know very well. By creating a totally separate DiscussingDissociation IM address, you will stay more protected.
I hope to be chatting with you soon!
Any questions or comments are welcome.